Thursday, August 8, 2013

The Weird Family on the Block!!

Did you know that 108% of household accidents involve ladders?! And that 19% of those accidents don't involve pants?!

(After much deliberation, I chose to subtly and classily pencil out Wy's derriere extraordinaire -- because of, you know, jail. AND! I didn't even draw something funny or inappropriate!! AND don't worry!! He never even climbed on the "Do Not Climb On This Step" step, even though that's ridiculous because it's a step on a ladder OF COURSE WE ARE GOING TO CLIMB ON IT.)

   We have lots of great neighbors with great families. Kids that play outside together, shooting hoops or kicking soccer balls. It's a huge blessing. And being at the end of a cul-de-sac means we don't worry too much about traffic or noise. Sometimes the neighbors will even watch Wyatt while I frolic in the sprinklers work on a project, which is a total blessing.

This is one of the neighbor boys on our street. His name is... Doug? Jeff? Theodore? I think there's a Theodore on our street somewhere. Maybe it's the cat? What were we talking about?! Oh! Neighbor boys. They are, honestly, his favorite people in the world. They even put that chair out for him when he's over.

   All these wonderful things have a real negative result: we're the bad ones. We're the ones with the kid who is often without a diaper, never wearing pants or a shirt, often shoe-less, and walking around trying to talk to everyone. There's sort of a "there goes Wyatt again" mentality on our street. Like "There goes Wyatt, trying to grab that cat's tail again. I wonder where his parents are?" Or "There goes Wyatt, picking all of our blueberries, eating none of them, and only wearing one shoe. Why is it always the left shoe?!" Or, my favorite, "There goes Wyatt again, throwing rocks at that truck. Is his shirt tucked in to his diaper?! At least he has a diaper this time. Why does he have a wrench!?"

This kid will never be cool. Especially not when his friends read my blog in 15 years. BECAUSE IT WILL STILL BE AROUND THEN.

   I'm a good dad!! I like to leave Wyatt shoe-less to improve his balance and toughen him up. I like to leave him pants-less because I wish I could be pants-less more often. I like to leave him shirt-less because, well, um, I'm usually shirtless and don't want to be the only one. I let him roam and explore because I'm a good dad!!

Two binks, one booger. He'd hold one bink, see it, and take out the other to put it in. He did this like 4 times. All while I tried and failed to grab that boogie.

   Cara is actually a good mom. Wyatt's always dressed and in a clean diaper and not running around with scissors when she's home. She definitely doesn't let him climb up and down ladders all day. But how else is he going to learn about gravity?! And mistakes? And pain? Because that's all this world is: gravity, mistakes and pain.

See!! We're weird!! This was moments after I asked him "Do you know what cross-eyed means?!" He still doesn't know what "blanket" means.
My mood: toughening kids up, one toddler at a time
Wyatt's mood: freedom!!
Listening to: Curious George music

No comments:

Post a Comment