Thursday, March 13, 2014

Wyatt Loves The Ocean!!

He's saying "Come on, let's go play in the water!" We'd just played in the water for like an hour.

   Oh man you guys, I had no idea. I mean, we've been to the beach before, as you've seen a couple of times, but never before had Wyatt been so in love with anything. Like, ever.

   On our trip to Santa Barbara, among other places, we spent half the day at the beach. Once Wyatt realized that you could be in the water for 15 seconds and still feel your toes, he realized that the water in California is more fun than the water in Oregon. And he never wanted to leave.

He would've run straight in, as far as he could, if we'd let him.

His face was like this the whole time. Look at that cute little face!!

Just some boring sand time with no water that he frickin' adored.

Oh yeah Cara was there too. We decided to all wear collared, blue shirts.
   He laughed so hard and smiled so big the whole time!! I bet his jaw hurt!! And the whole time he was thinking "What great parents I have to bring me here and let me play!!" Because we really are great parents. I mean, just watch this video of him rolling down the teenie-tiny sand dune:


   That probably happened 15 times total. All of this sand climbing and rolling, ocean chasing and laughing is probably what lead to him falling asleep as he kept playing.

   Okokok you get it, this was great and he had fun and everyone was happy. Can we talk about something else now? Like, elephant seals?


      Cara and I were laughing so hard because that scene reminded us of our bedtime ritual.

My mood: can't sleep
Wyatt's mood can't sleep just long enough to keep me from sleeping.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014


   Way back at the new year, Cara and Wyatt and I took a vaycay to cali. Something I learned while vaycaying in cali: only posers call it "cali" and only girls call it "vaycay." The three of us flew to San Jose, rented a car and made stops and stays in Monterey, Big Sur, San Luis Obispo, Santa Barbara, and ... um ... Riverside.

   Now you're thinking "wait how did I not know this?! Someone spending time in California is required to absolutely blow up my instagram, facebook, twitter, and send me postcards so that the whole world knows!! Well, I wanted to play it cool because a) that's what this blog is for, and b) IF I ANNOUNCE TO THE WORLD THAT I AM GONE WHILE I AM GONE THEN EVERYONE WILL COME ROB ME!!! And I don't want to lose my Pokemon cards, because I have a killer deck that my brother could never beat because I made him trade me that Venusaur for a Charmeleon when he was like seven and what a sucker. I think he's learned from that experience though.

There's a real fun aquariam in Monterey that everyone says you have to visit. This was a big tank with sharks and turtles and sadly nothing eathing anything else. It's located inside the Mystery Science 2000 Leagues Under The Sea Theater. It turns out that when you've seen Free Willy in person, a little hammerhead isn't so impressive.

There was also a clam that made Cara uncomfortably happy. Like, I was uncomfortable. Wy wasn't too sure either.

In Monterey, there is a place where thousands of Monarch butterflies are supposed to converge. I don't know why this is exciting. Do they taste good or something? Anyways, the wife really wanted to check it out, and on the way we found this awesome park bench. I was so relieved to finally learn that the legacy did not in fact die, but was continuing very, very far from Colorado.
(we saw like 4 butterflies).

Big Sur was nice, although not a great place to go with a 2 year old. Wyatt napped at all the wrong times (hikes) and wanted to play at all the wrong times (in the car). Here was a waterfall that we just "had to see" according to everyone, and apparently Big Sur doesn't realize that these little suckers litter every highway in Oregon. I learned that Big Sur is not a place where dudes go to surf.

There were, however, lots of really awesome views. This is where we thought we'd find Peter Pan as the mermaids try to drown Wendy. Cara thought I was a little too excited at the idea of seeing a mermaid, but I kept telling her that I've seen topless fish hundreds of times. In fact I don't even get excited by it anymore.

   This is the mission in Santa Barbara. I wasn't sure why we were making a point to see it once I learned it wasn't like a famous restaurant or anything. I'd show you pictures of the inside, but you care less than I do so let's move on.

   We had a wonderful time in Santa Barbara. I was hoping to bump into the guys from Psych, and hung around all the crime scenes I could find, but alas. The thing we liked most about SB is it's where we spent the longest time crashed on the beach. Wyatt loved the beach. Like, I think it might now be his favorite thing in the world besides his dad and fussing. I will have a separate post about our beach adventures, but hopefully this will ... tide ... you over.

My mood: ready for another vaycay - dang it! I mean vacation!!
Wyatt's mood: looking for a single missing car
Listening to: Kings of Leon on repeat for like 7 days.

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Self Entertaining!!

Car-cars and George-Georges

   Whoa, guys, Wyatt has gotten really good at playing with himself. Wait, I mean, let me rephrase that. Wyatt's gotten really good at playing by himself. He's at this adorable, precious little point where he will drive his cars everywhere, say a bunch of gibberish, and then have a big exclamation. Like this.

   Just so you know, this video is like 50 seconds long and is not 100% action, which means it will feel like it's four years long in internet time. However, the main reason I have this blog is NOT to entertain you and NOT so that I can get attention for myself, but so that I can have a place to come and look at videos and pictures and stories of me Wyatt for years to come. Also, odds are pretty good that you are my grandma and want to see this anyways, so, you probably don't care.


   Are you curious about what he is thinking, saying, or acting out? Well, pretty much all we watch is the Fast and Furious: Tokyo Drifts in our household, so, odds are pretty good it's that.

A few things to notice about my parenting techniques:

  1. I have a "dog-bowl" style feeding system. There's a big vat of food, eat it if you want.
  2. Dirty hands are not bad hands. Go ahead and touch that cute little stationery your Aunt gave your mom. In fact, touch every page just a little.
  3. Do you see how he plays around the laptop?! He knows he shouldn't touch it, but what can he possibly due if that George and George George head in the computers direction?
  4. I have to ignore Wyatt for about 10 minutes for him to play like this. Once he gets the point, he'll play. He'll bug his mom ALL DAY, however, so she has it harder.
   Here's a bit more of the same, a few minutes later (I edited out some gripping footage of him slowly walking to the couch to get a couple more car-cars.) I always have the same thought: What triggers him to do what he does? Why does he decide to drive to the banana and play with it for a second? Why, all of a sudden, does he grab more tomato sauce? What on earth is going on in that head of is, and holy cow I wish I knew what he thought he was saying.


   He will do this for hours. I mean, hours. I'm pretty sure that I could go to the store and back and he'd still be doing his Vin Diesel on the floor. He even does it as he's falling asleep. (This video's like 12 seconds long so chill out!!)


  Sure is cute and sure is fun!! We'll see how long he is able to self entertain, and hopefully it lasts through the long, wet winter.

My mood: kind of left out, actually
Wy's mood: Car crash george george!!
Listening to: Jake and the Never Land Pilots. Oh, wait, Pirates, they're pirates.

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

The Pioneer Father "Cooks"

   I'm home with the boy a lot of evenings right now. Mom's working late a couple nights a week, and dad's in charge of making food for her. Mom's very unhappy if she comes home to things that aren't just right. It's kind of ridiculous how high her standards are. Like, just the other day, she came home and was all "why haven't you changed his poopy diaper why haven't you cleaned anything why is the water running in three of our sinks why is there a big pile of mayonnaise on the carpet why are you still playing pokemon at your age!?" and I'm all "Whoa!? How about some it's great to see you husband who I love when you walk through the door next time!?" I know Wyatt would appreciate it, he hates to see me unhappy. Just, you know, make sure when you walk through the door you don't step in that bowl of salsa with chips around it.

   Anyways, food. We have a persimmon tree in our back yard that puts out hundreds of fruit each year. That is not an exaggeration (I need to make that clear because I exaggerate like 6 trillion percent of the time. Our first year, I tried to eat one, and my face went numb (exaggeration!). It turns out they don't get ripe until November, and it was, you know, September.
   Our second year we left them on the tree until they were ripe, but all the birds and squirrels ate them in just a couple days. It was sort of fun to have so many woodland creatures around. I would wake up in the morning and stick my head out the window and sing and pretend like they all came running to me.
   This year, our third fall in our house, we knew to pick them in September/October and put them in the garage, then eat them in November/December. And to freeze them so we could eat them whenever.

Yumm! bowls with a smoothie. (If you aren't from Eugene, you probably read that wrong.) See that orange thing to the far right? It's a persimmon. So is the thing cut in half to the left of the banana. This is the only healthy meal I have made in seven months, so don't be too impressed.

   You've probably never had persimmon. It's an Asian fruit, I'm told, that Asian's love, I'm also told. So if you see an Asian, be like "hey do you like persimmon!?" and just watch what happens. Also, don't pronounce it "permission" because then that last line sounds even worse. There are two types of permissions, one that you can pick and eat and love off the tree (they really are delicious, I've had one once) and then there's our kind. Ours is only ripe when it's skin is like a water balloon, and the stuff inside is like a bunch of jelly. It doesn't eat well, but it cooks quite well. That's where I, Grant, Master Chef Recipe Instruction Follower come in. I've got three moves so far:

The one on the left has blueberry. The one on the right should have some vodka, I think.
1) Persimmon/Banana Smoothie. This involves a banana, some persimmon, and a smoothie. Well, ice, and if you are adventurous you cut it with some apple juice and maybe throw some blueberries in there. It is actually really, really good, and since we have so many persimmons we have them a lot.

This was probably my best loaf ever. I miss it terribly.

2) Persimmon/Banana Bread. Yeah okay fine everything involves banana, leave me alone. This is also quite wonderful, and quite easy (Not that it matters how easy it is! I COULD DO IT EVEN IF IT WERE HARD!!). We have this once or twice a week as well.

Mater loves to tow bread around!!

3) Persimmon cookies (no banana!) They taste a lot like persimonny ginger snaps, but you don't know what a persimmon tastes like so that means nothing to you.

   We're thinking about making some persimmon jam, and maybe just throwing some persimmons at our neighbor's houses. Other than that, we still aren't sure what we can do with them. I had a friend come and take hundreds of the fruit, so maybe I'll ask him what he did with all those. But my guess is he'll just say"art."

   This means that between my staple, ready-to-make-for-a-party meals of "chicken," "Costco Lasagna" and "hot ham water," I can really throw a shindig.

My mood: full!!
Wyatt's mood: neglected!
Cara's mood: Angry about the state of the house but get over it or fix it yourself it's not my fault Wyatt loves to mash chips into little crumbs and spread them all over the living room!!

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Color Symmetry!!

   Hey guys! Listen up! Wyatt's starting to color coordinate things! Wow is it fun. I need to show you like a hundred pictures to prove it.

You're really glad we got these new, larger, high-quality photos here at MKIS so that you can really enjoy these blocks.
   He did this while we were at the aquariam in Monterey, California. Yeah that's right we went on a trip to the California Sunshine and I didn't even facebook or blog about it because whatever it's not like it's a big deal and I don't have to announce it to the world or anything. Also, Yeah, uh huh, while at the aquariam that had actual sharks, otters, and lots of pictures of jellyfish without actual jellyfish, we spent most of our time playing with blocks that we have at home. Still, this color action was new for him, I hadn't seen it yet.

   Full diclosure: I am not convinced this was Wyatt. There is a chance it was Cara, because this is about at her level of craftsmanship and (in)attention to detail. I think it was the special kid, though, so we'll go with that.

   Man, can you believe it?! Coordinating and symmetric with colors already!! Most kids aren't doing this until they are, I don't know, twelve? (No, seriously, I don't know. Fifteen? Judging by my freshman, it's probably after 15.) And my brother still doesn't quite get that YOU CAN'T WEAR GREY SWEATS WITH A GREY SWEATSHIRT TO OUR AWESOME DINNER PARTIES!! Heck, based on how the girl students at school point at me and laugh, and have even suggested a fashion tumblr for me to follow, it seems that Wyatt is really getting these color-matching skills without any help from his dad's side. Regarding that tumblr: I didn't follow it, but instead sent in a picture of myself and asked what I needed to work on.

And so you can really enjoy... whatever this is.

   They did not respond. There's only one way to interpret that: I have nothing to work on.

My mood: so proud Wyatt is inheriting my color-awareness genes (and jeans, if we're lucky)
Cara's mood: trying to stack the blocks higher than ever!!
Wyatt's mood: george george
Listening to: Magic Schoolbus Theme Song

Saturday, December 14, 2013


   Guys!! I need to make this very clear to you: I lead a super exciting life full of fun and adventure. Even though I have the special little kid, it's not like my life is any less full throttle than it was 5 years ago.
   Proof: A few weekends ago, Cara and I spontaneously decided to go crabbing. (Ha!! For a second there those b's in "crabbing" were accidental p's. What fun!) We'd bought a "pot" - which is what the indigenous people call the crab-trap-box - a few months earlier on sale and wanted to try it, so we hopped in the manlyvan for another trip to the coast.
   Spontaneous trips to the coast?! Well that's only all we ever did in college.

Circa 2005
   This was taken in a simpler time, when Cara had a boyfriend who wasn't me and I had a haircut that should've happened weeks ago. You might think "I wonder if Grant is embarassed by a picture with his hair like that?" No. I am not. Because I know there are also pictures like this:

Circa a few months later in 2005
   The scarf definitely makes that thing work. I'm so glad to know this picture, which I pulled off facebook, will be on the internet forever.
       Anyways, crabbing. We loaded up the pot, 4 or 5 random cords and ropes, some thawing chicken, and all the little-boy gear we'd ever need. Then we drove as West as the roads can take you. To our surprise, and I mean we were shocked, it was an absolutely glorious day at the coast. The sun wasn't really out, there was light cloud cover the whole time, but it was warm, breezy, light and relaxing. Days like this at the coast are a treat.

This might not look like much, but imagine all of the paintings it could inspire!
   So, here's the deal. We have no idea how to crab. I've never been crabbing before, I'm pretty sure Cara hadn't either because she was absolutely useless the whole time, and we were to afraid to ask all the other "pro" crabbers around us at the dock for help, so we just tied three ropes together to make them long enough to reach the ocean floor, strung some chicken up (do crabs like chicken?! I'm sure they do, who doesn't?) and then pulled the pot up again a couple hours later.

   And if you don't think having a two-year-old running around the docks above the water for half an hour is stressful, well, um, you'd... you'd be wrong. So, we decided to leave it and play at the water for a while.

   Wyatt did not like the route we had to take to the water, through the grasses.

   Why didn't we just carry him? BECAUSE HE HAS TO LEARN, THAT'S WHY.

   WYATT SURE LOVED TO PLAY ONCE WE GOT THERE SORRY I LEFT MY CAPS ON FROM ABOVE AND JUST NOW NOTICED. We discovered that he likes two things: putting sand on his head and running from the water.


   We had so much fun. It's rare to be on the beach in Oregon in November and not have to hide from the brutal, mercilessly cold winds. Also, I think Cara finally has a picture of the two of us that doesn't make her regret marrying me.

Hmm. Grant might need to invest in some teeth whitening.
  We returned to our pots (which, when I write it like that makes it sound like we are drug addicts), only to find that all of the bait was gone, and there were no crabs in it. It turns out we didn't have the traps set up correctly, so the crabs could come and go as they pleased. So instead of crab for dinner, we feasted on some Safeway Chinese take-out, which was our plan all along anyways and in no way disappointing. Still, we had lots of fun and skipped a gross, dark, foggy day back home for a fun day in the sand. Yay us! We're the best and exciting and don't spend all of our time at home okay!!

   My mood: Pleased with our fun day!
   Wyatt's mood: Hates having sandy hair in his carseat!!
   Listening to: Enya

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Wyatt Does Not Love Snow!!

   Okay, let's just fast forward through all the stupid text, where I write cute things and hope you pick up on my sarcasm, but I know you won't because you're not smart. Is it sarcasm if you're just being mean? Anyways. Video.

   No. Seriously. THIS VIDEO.


   Wyatt's been in the snow before, but that was before he and Word Girl had visited the planet Lexicon. Now he's able to say words to communicate what he is feeling. Well, when I say "words" I mean "a single word at a time over and over." In this case, the word was "wash," as in "wash this stuff off me," as in "I don't want to have this stuff on me, please wash it off."
   He's a funny kid, in that he loves playing in all kinds of messy stuff, but has specific things he will not tolerate. Specifically: stuff on his hands. He'll play in the dirt for hours, but hates having dirt stuck to his hands. He'll put stickers on anything, but if they are stuck to his fingers he freaks out. He'll play in the snow until it gets on his hands, then he runs to me to clean them off. I kind of think he saw and felt the falling snow and realized "I am never going to be free of this" and was so shocked and afraid, all he could must was the world's cutest "wash" over and over.

   Now, you're thinking "Well maybe if you'd put actual snow clothes on him like, oh I don't know, gloves and a hat, he'd do better!?" Gee!! I hadn't thought of that!! Oh wait I obviously have because I'm the one writing what you were thinking in the first place. It turns out Wyatt hates gloves and loathes hats. We can't get either to stay on him. So, we're stuck with just lasting as long as we can outside, which is usually about ten minutes.

No hat, jacket, gloves or shoes. He's a real tough guy.

I don't know why he likes to bite his lips so much, probably an attempt to feel his face as it grows increasingly numb.

Awww, cute little guy likes to cuddle with his pretty little mom.

Huh, wow, that's much more of a "look into the camera and smile" picture than we usually get.

And that's more of a "look off into the distance in an inspiring manner" picture than we usually get.

      Now you're thinking "were all of those giant pictures really necessary?" No. No they were not.

   My mood: cabin fever!!
   Wyatt's mood: get it off my hands!!
   Listening to: John Mayer.