Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Answering The Door

     There's a moment that I experienced today that I am sure the rest of you housewives out there can relate to. That moment of fear when your doorbell rings, and you just aren't ready to answer it. Maybe you've been breast feeding (The worst! And it never works! Amiright?), maybe you're covered in baby goop after a quick change.
     It's 10:30 am, Cara is at work, and I am feeding Wyatt Traeden from the bottle. The doorbell rings, and I remember my friend "Jim" "Whipple" from church is coming over to drop something off. My heart sinks: Jim is an elder member of my church. I go to the door:
     I open the door a crack. "Hey Jim! I hope it's not too rude that I don't open the door all the way and let you in."
     Jim: Oh, no, but I'm not afraid of anything you've got going on in there.
     Me: Well... um... ever seen a man feeding a baby in his underwear?
     Jim: You know, last night I saw [name withheld] not wearing any clothes at all.
            Really, where did you see [him] naked? Bible study?
            No, not this time. It was at the DAC.
      I've let Jim in the house at this point, as he watches me feed my baby in my underwear he looks me up and down and grunts a subtle approval, and we finish our conversation.

     I don't know what's sadder: that I knew a friend was coming over in the morning and still had to greet him in my underwear, or the fact that if he had come at 3:00 in the afternoon there's a good chance the exact same thing would have happened.

     "Jim" dropped of a present that had some fun stuffing in it, so guess what happened!!!:

Traeden grew an afro!! And licked his jacket apparently too!!
Traeden's Mood: Itchy
My mood: Embarassed (awkward face emoticon)
Listening to: Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas

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